Dear Kurt

An open letter from Brett Favre to Kurt Warner on retirement.

Dear Kurt,

    Hey Kurt! What is going on? Not too much going on with me. I am on the clock, and no not with the draft, it is my annual while I retire clock. Be sure to watch plenty of ESPN, they will definitely keep you

updated on the latest.

     I saw recently that you decided to retire, wow. Are you really doing? Are you really going to do it? Are you mad enough at the Cardinals to let that playboy Leinart? I imagine you have to be because he is the worst. Sorry I got a little sidetracked. It is still hard for me to imagine you retiring. I do not think you can do it. I think it is just a big April fools joke to mess with the Cardinals so you can retire as a Ram. I am totally right. I hope that you know that god does not like liars and I know how much enjoy the big man up stairs. 

     If you are serious, how could you not be having fun anymore? Have you not seen any of my games? I am always having fun, just ask Joe Buck (he loves me).  I tried that retirement thing before (I really just wanted the attention). Let me tell you, it is not fun.

     Every time you go hang out with some high schoolers, people think you are coming out of retirement. In my case it happened to be true but that is not my point. If you really want to people to leave you alone, do not pick up a football.  You do not want Ed Werder following you around. I could not make a move last off season with that man being around, and let me tell you, he is really creepy. One day I went to throw outthe garbage and there he was sleeping in my bushes. Although to be perfectly honest with you, I do not think ESPN loves you as much as they love me, so you probably do not have to worry about that. Wait till I actually retire; They will have multiple moments of silence in my honor. They would be better off just talking about me for an hour instead of showing the pro bowl. Who watches that?

     If you actually stay retired, I commend you. Maybe we can hang out while I am trying to decide to retire or not. The Vikings said they would not put a time table on my decision. Fools.I am going to leave them hanging right up until  he season starts and then make my decision (but do not tell them that). I guess they have not paid any attention to any of my last three seasons.

     Well anyways Kurt, good luck retiring(you can tell me anytime that you are not really retiring.I still do not really believe you are).Throw on a solid pair of wrangler jeans and just relax(I know you own some. How could you not? I am a great salesman).You better write back to me. If you are really retired, I know you will get back to me asap.

Your friend,

Brett # 4